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Atricle Dump - Spasms & Spamocidal Mania
As always, the grand creator puts things in my path to point in which direction my column should take each month. It is laid before me in such a manner that I become passionate about writing the experience in detail. Because many publications allow only 700 words, I have to chop my column to fit the criteria, yet in my books I let it flow naturally.I recently made a trip to
But spam... hooboy!
SQUISH 'EM LIKE BUGS!
I believe we should have a constitutional amendment allowing cruel and unusual punishment in the case of spammers. Maybe that tummy thing like the Japanese do when they get depressed.
As with drugs, mere possession of bulk emailing software should result in the imm
An easy way to beginAffiliate marketing is one of the easiest and fastest ways to get into business on the Internet.What it means is that you affiliate yourself with a company and market their products or services. You don't have to worry about developing your own product or service, about shipping, billing or credit card clearance, or after-sales service. Y
S.H.U. (Spam-Haters Unanimous)
N.A.A.P.W.H.S. (National Association for the Advancement of People Who Hate Spam)
P.W.H.P.W.D.H.S. (People Who Hate People Who Don't Hate Spam)
P.F.W.S.H.I.A.L.C. (People for Whom Spam-Hating is a Lifestyle Choice)
S.A.P.W.R.R.R.H.S. (Society for the Advancement of People Who Really Really Really Hate Spam)
P.W.H.S.S.M.I.M.L.W.S.C.O.T.E. (People Who Hate Spam So Much It Makes Little Wisps of Steam Come Out of Their Ears)
And, of course: Spam Haters In The Business of Internet Resource Directory Services.
DEAR FELLOW SPAM HATERS,
I'm writing to suggest that we combine forces in order to present a common front in our righteous war on unsolicited commercial email:
Spam!
I suggest we disband the myriad sites and organizations now opposing unsolicited commercial email in order to form a single, unified organization:
The Spammish Inquisition!
And I further suggest we elect me, Linda Cox, as our leader. Our Grand Inquisatrix!
WHAT ARE MY QUALIFICATIONS?
You think YOU hate spam? You don't even know what hate is!
I hate spam so much that I... well, just a LOT! That's how much!
If I hated spam any more than I already do, I think my head would burst into flames and spin like a top! Can you say that?
Don't think so.
I don't mean to say that I don't hate other things too, like pedophiles and nazis and that drunk guy who backed over my cat when I was seven.
But spam... hooboy!
SQUISH 'EM LIKE BUGS!
I believe we should have a constitutional amendment allowing cruel and unusual punishment in the case of spammers. Maybe that tummy thing like the Japanese do when they get depressed.
As with drugs, mere possession of bulk emailing software should result in the imm
If you’re a natural talker, you should know that talk isn’t cheap—when it comes to the speaking circuit. In fact, you can actually earn more than $100,000 by delivering motivational speeches. Professional speakers are in high demand these days, thanks to the myriad of speaking opportunities available at schools, charitable functions, and professional workshops. Community organi
P.W.H.S.S.M.I.M.L.W.S.C.O.T.E. (People Who Hate Spam So Much It Makes Little Wisps of Steam Come Out of Their Ears)
And, of course: Spam Haters In The Business of Internet Resource Directory Services.
DEAR FELLOW SPAM HATERS,
I'm writing to suggest that we combine forces in order to present a common front in our righteous war on unsolicited commercial email:
Spam!
I suggest we disband the myriad sites and organizations now opposing unsolicited commercial email in order to form a single, unified organization:
The Spammish Inquisition!
And I further suggest we elect me, Linda Cox, as our leader. Our Grand Inquisatrix!
WHAT ARE MY QUALIFICATIONS?
You think YOU hate spam? You don't even know what hate is!
I hate spam so much that I... well, just a LOT! That's how much!
If I hated spam any more than I already do, I think my head would burst into flames and spin like a top! Can you say that?
Don't think so.
I don't mean to say that I don't hate other things too, like pedophiles and nazis and that drunk guy who backed over my cat when I was seven.
But spam... hooboy!
SQUISH 'EM LIKE BUGS!
I believe we should have a constitutional amendment allowing cruel and unusual punishment in the case of spammers. Maybe that tummy thing like the Japanese do when they get depressed.
As with drugs, mere possession of bulk emailing software should result in the imm
No this is not a statement from a fringe group who are avoiding the frayed nerves and expense associated with Christmas Shopping, cooking, boisterous children and upset tummies. Christmas is a time where a million and one things must happen and be in place (more or less) by the time presents are unwrapped on Christmas day.To be honest most of us manage it. We enjoy (or toler
Spam!
I suggest we disband the myriad sites and organizations now opposing unsolicited commercial email in order to form a single, unified organization:
The Spammish Inquisition!
And I further suggest we elect me, Linda Cox, as our leader. Our Grand Inquisatrix!
WHAT ARE MY QUALIFICATIONS?
You think YOU hate spam? You don't even know what hate is!
I hate spam so much that I... well, just a LOT! That's how much!
If I hated spam any more than I already do, I think my head would burst into flames and spin like a top! Can you say that?
Don't think so.
I don't mean to say that I don't hate other things too, like pedophiles and nazis and that drunk guy who backed over my cat when I was seven.
But spam... hooboy!
SQUISH 'EM LIKE BUGS!
I believe we should have a constitutional amendment allowing cruel and unusual punishment in the case of spammers. Maybe that tummy thing like the Japanese do when they get depressed.
As with drugs, mere possession of bulk emailing software should result in the imm
What does online marketing have to do with a ghost? Plenty. Read this and you will see why. The memory still unsettles me whenever I think back to that night.The experience taught me that to write about a product, you have to see it at work. You will see how this can help you, also. But first, here is what happened that night.It was November - almost 3 years ago.
I hate spam so much that I... well, just a LOT! That's how much!
If I hated spam any more than I already do, I think my head would burst into flames and spin like a top! Can you say that?
Don't think so.
I don't mean to say that I don't hate other things too, like pedophiles and nazis and that drunk guy who backed over my cat when I was seven.
But spam... hooboy!
SQUISH 'EM LIKE BUGS!
I believe we should have a constitutional amendment allowing cruel and unusual punishment in the case of spammers. Maybe that tummy thing like the Japanese do when they get depressed.
As with drugs, mere possession of bulk emailing software should result in the imm
If you really want to control the outcome of your job search activities and eventually land the job that you have dreamed of, it is essential that you avoid some of the most common mistakes that many job seekers fall victim to. All you need to do is to take out all the fear and apprehension from your mind and take an analytical approach to your job search. Learn with an open mind
But spam... hooboy!
SQUISH 'EM LIKE BUGS!
I believe we should have a constitutional amendment allowing cruel and unusual punishment in the case of spammers. Maybe that tummy thing like the Japanese do when they get depressed.
As with drugs, mere possession of bulk emailing software should result in the immediate confiscation of the computer it was on, as well as any nice clothes, jewelry, or lawn statuary that might have been purchased with spam profits.
Just thinking about sending spam should be illegal, like joking about bombs in an airport. If I get to be Grand Inquisatrix, I'll have my own force of men-in-black dudes to sniff out spamsters and be really mean to them and call them names until they promise to be good little netizens again.
It's for their own good.
IN CLOSING...
Having looked at the websites of some of the anti-spam crusaders, I know that I am not alone in my revulsion, disgust and utter skin-crawling contempt for spam.
Like them, I have turned a blind-eye to more mundane problems like hunger, illiteracy, disease, country music and poverty so as to focus on the true menace ravaging our cyber-society.
If you wish to support my crusade, you may do so by sending me $99, and as a free gift I'll send you a CD with the email addresses of 40 million netizens eagerly awaiting news of your latest product or service.
Linda Cox, G.I.W. (Grand Inquisatrix Wannabe)
P.S. Oh yeah... stale croutons. Hate 'em.
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